Archive for January 28, 2019


I had so much fun with posting YouTubes yesterday that I thought I’d do it one more time. Try not to yawn.

I have never had to do that. It is my worst nightmare. I can’t imagine being able to remember anything while talking in front of others. Once my anxiety levels of stagefright take over I have no words. Forget that I could save lives by what I know. Add to the fact that if I remember it wrong or use the wrong words a person could be put in jail or to death and the brain would shut down.

The amazing thing is I can sing in front of a crowd. But the words are to a melody and rhythm. And they are memorized with gesticulations. But you know how on the news the reporters go to a person asking about their experience? Yeah. My words would sound like a foreign language. The tongue would be tangled. I’d break out in a cold sweat. I feel amazed when I see people talking like they do, like educated folk that lend to the news story.

Nope. Not me. EVER.

I’ve had jobs where I had to sell. Totally the wrong job for me. They say that if you love something its easy to talk about. Maybe true with my friends and family. But not with strangers. That’s why I write. Even then I don’t capture what I feel to the depth I want.

Then there is the aphasia. I’ve had a form of that most of my life and now that I’m old it has gotten so much worse. Often I forget what the word for forgetting words is. The more tired, the lack of sleep, the pain and words go out the window. NaNoWriMo can be terrifying if I’m having those problems. I’ve learned a trick with it though. I gain wordage to boot. Brackets. [the word that means you have to get up in front of the judge and jury and talk] See? Later when I get to those brackets I will know that word and fill in that one word, in this case, testify.

With friends and family I can do that, “You know the word that means…” and really close friends can practically read my mind. What’s funny now is that as I age, so do they and it seems they are looking for words that I can find on the tip of my tongue. I know that is because I don’t have the anxiety of finding the word.

BUT the worst is when everyone is stuck. Like contagious stagefright. You can have a whole room of people looking for the word. What happens is that a different sort of ‘catchy’ happens then. The giggles.

Thanks, Linda and Dan!

Wow! Thank you, Sadja for nominating me for the

Sunshine Bloggers Award

The Rules

  1. Thank the person who nominated you and provide a link back to their blog so others can find them. ✔️
  2. Answer the 11 questions asked by the blogger who nominated you.✔️
  3. Nominate 11 other bloggers and ask them 11 new questions. ( 5 questions and 6 nominations only) 🔵
  4. Notify the nominees about it on one of their own posts.✔️
  5. List the rules and display the Sunshine Blogger Award logo on your post and/or your blog site.✔️

Sadje’s Questions to me:

What is the best thing about blogging?

There are several good reasons to blog. And rather than choose just one, I will share a couple. I love making new friends around the world. And I love the chance to write.

Have you written or plan to write a book? If so what is your genre?

I have lost count of the novels I have written. I think I have 13. I’ve written them for NaNoWriMo, either in November or inventing my own month. They are mostly sci-fi/fantasy. They were fun until the time to edit. I am horrid at getting that done.

Do you make life seriously or are you a happy-go-lucky person?

I used to be rather Pollyanna about things. I still mostly lean to the optimistic viewpoint. But lately, seriousness attacks me and threaten depression. I do have clinical depression but most meds don’t help. I have to work on it when I feel it coming in. Though there is plenty to be discouraged about, lack of sunshine can get to me. Thank goodness we have had a few sunny days to go and sit outside and absorb that vitamin D.

Do you believe in coincidence or you think everything is predestined?

I think the answer is somewhere in between. Though I have been a Tarot Card reader for a long time and even did it for a very short time for pay. I just felt that folks relied on it so much they didn’t mind spending their hard earned money just to find out if they would soon get rich. I did feel it worked well as a counseling device. I could use a card to find out what was hurting the client and help them find ways to work on that in their lives. But very few clients used that. They called often and wouldn’t try to get out of their own way. What that told me was that if something seemed coincidental too often you are drawing it to yourself by thinking on it a lot. And nothing is predestined that a thought process can’t pull you out. If you think all is doom and gloom and you look around and can prove it is, you have brought that to yourself. There are many books about manifesting. Yes, it is hard to do–until it isn’t.

Closing your eyes and imagine yourself in a place you have always wanted to visit. Where are you?

I miss the beach. Any beach. I miss being out on the ocean. We got to go on a cruise to Alaska once. Never would have thought this Southern California girl would like that cold. But I loved it. I figure it was the water that was made my inner mermaid happy.

Bloggers I would like to present this award to:

Well, here is where I will break the rules. I’ve gotten all the way to this part of awards before. I love all the blogs I follow. I have a hard time narrowing it down. And then people hesitate to accept because of this same reason. So here is what I’d like. If you want to accept this award, please let me know. If you want some questions to answer choose mine or follow the blog chain back and find a few you really have a desire to answer. I know everyone is busy right now, especially if you are trying to keep up with Just Jot It January.


Congratulations to you all. I hope that you guys can accept this and pay it forward, but if not you can give it a pass altogether or you can just answer the questions. Your call. If anyone feels able to answer my questions, please do.





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