Category: Health


Shoulder Surgery


Tonight at midnight my husband will get up and get prepared for the trip to the hospital. My brother will be driving around 2:30 AM for an hour and a half to the hospital. The surgery is scheduled for 5ish. There was no way I could do the drive that early. Why did they have to schedule out of towners at that hour?

So Tuesday is my drive day. When he gets out of surgery and had time to recover I will dive up to get him and bring him home. I so wish for the days my body would let me be awake at any time and drive to anywhere at any time. I feel bad about not being by his side. We will be face-timing as soon as he can talk. Thank goodness for modern technology!

I will try to keep you all apprised of the situation. And I have a review to post tomorrow so I won’t be gone from the blogosphere for long.

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No this isn’t about Mamas and the Papas. Just couldn’t figure a good title for this small bloggy. Besides, bet that earworm took! 😀

I don’t have enough time to gather all the looms to do a Make-it Monday: Two sock-looms are in use, there are a few dolls I need to stuff and sew closed, a little hat for a doll on the littlest loom, a baby hat on the next bigger, all in process and nothing near finished product.

So, while knitting, binging, right? Tried Royal Pain but too flirty and not enough medical to keep my interest. I’ll try again later. Instead, I went for an old favorite that has added new seasons: Call the Midwife. I love that show. I miss Miranda (Chumie) but the newer cast is still sweet. One of the best parts of this show is following women and health issues over the past couple of centuries. If you were there at the beginning, there were few cars only bicycles. They even went through war.

I’m at about 1962 in a most recent episode. They talk about Kennedy and Cuba crises. So it isn’t just the women’s health it shows what else is going on in the world at the time. On the last episode, they showed the results of the drug given for morning sickness back then Thalidomide.

This show doesn’t hold back when it comes to things women have been through over the years. I do so wish the midwife was a more acceptable way for birth. My last two were homebirths so I have a love for that kind of birth. Don’t get me wrong. There is a good reason to have hospitals and doctors on hand, but I think the woman to woman care is missing for those who need to go to the hospital.

My second experience in the hospital were people running around yelling the phones were out. My first was a most uncomfortable affair with not the slightest care as to what I wanted or what baby and I actually needed. I studied a lot about being a midwife, but by the time I had babies three and four, I didn’t have the time or energy to go for it. So this show helps fulfill some of that. I find I love all the characters and how well they tell the story. And that music gets me going! I can guarantee that I will shed at least a tear with every viewing! This is a herstory that everyone should watch and maybe get the other side of history.


Reiki: Reiki For Beginners, A Complete Guide To The Holistic Healing Modality Usui Reiki Level 2, Reiki: Reiki For Beginners, A Complete Guide To The Holistic Healing Modality Usui Reiki Level 2, “FREE GIFT INCLUDED” Heal Yourself And Increase Your Energy With Reiki.Manual level 2 by Djamel Boucly
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

I’ve read a few books on Reiki. Most of them have nuggets of beauty and health. I loved this one. There is something for everyone, Reiki attuned or just curious. There are enough references to learn a lot about metaphysical healing. There are healing avenues addressed in this book, including sound, color, and chakra healings. And it was free when I picked it up.

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Just Jot It January is Linda G. Hill’s gem. The prompt “Master” is brought to us by Sadje of Keep It Alive.

When I saw the prompt I went musical. “It’s a lot/It’s a lot…” With Depeche Mode. Then I found myself in Les Miz with om pah pah om pah Enter Monsieur

 

Since it is January and everyone is talking about resolutions or possibilities of healthy living I thought how many things I want to master. Like I’d like to move without pain. Eat, drink, and move with a mastery of self and pain. I think it is possible. I’ll keep trying.

The other day I found that Udemy is having a sale on classes for editing. It was such a good bargain (and I hope they are good people). So, I’d like to master my writing.

Okay, maybe mastery is too perfect. I want proficiency to the point that I like what I’m doing and unafraid to share with others. What I have learned over my life is that perfection is lonely and never fun. It can send me running away if I find myself working in that mindset. On the other hand, not trying will never  get you there. Finding a balance of trying and being happy in the attempt seems the only way I can do anything.

Does that make sense? I was raised by someone that wanted perfection. Wouldn’t let me leave the piano until I could play a phrase or song perfectly. The bed needed to be made perfectly, the house should be cleaned perfectly. But that parent was bipolar. The house would be so clean you could eat off the bathroom floor, or she’d be laying on the sofa in complete depression. So as an adult, I had a hard time finding my own levels.

I needed to find how to be happy playing the piano. Singing helped. I needed to find how to clean and thought I had it down to happy until the fibro hit. Then I found I had to be happy with whatever my body allowed that moment. Delegate and be happy with how they do it–or don’t.

It seems that nowadays I have to look at every movement for every job and goal. Oh, and maybe the word happy isn’t it. I think I could happy my way back to weeks in bed. When I really get into something, say working on a pair of socks, I can enjoy it too much. Hands hurting for weeks but nice to have the socks done? The trade-off is too off. So the aim is to do just short of the goal. Be happy with the results later. Not the way we have been taught. But maybe more the master of life by knowing limitations?

You would think at 69 I’d have this whole concept mastered. Live and learn. Have you found mastery of life easy?

 


On Edge: A Journey Through AnxietyOn Edge: A Journey Through Anxiety by Andrea Petersen
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

I voluntarily reviewed an Advance Reader Copy of this book. Boy, am I glad I did! It was well-written and well-researched.

Do you suffer from anxiety/depression like I do? Have you taken every drug the doctor prescribed and not have it work at all? Here is someone who has. I personally related to this book. Andrea Petersen tells her story while relating it to the science in history and current treatments for these ailments. She tells about her experiences helping us to see all the things in her life that could have or didn’t cause her own problems. She owns what she can but it isn’t a blame game for her. It is trying to understand how it was she thought she was going to die during anxiety episodes.

I am going to put a bit of a spoiler here as it is the one takeaway I want to remember. And I’ll tell you why. Have you had a panic attack? I have. But I’ve also had stage fright. I used to sing solos at churches. I found this to be true: If I could get excited about singing the song in front of people I rarely made mistakes and the song sounded pretty good. I never could have said that about giving a speech or playing solos on the piano. TERRIFIED FROZEN POOL OF SWEAT. The same applies to talking to people on the phone, even people I love. If I had the performance memorized and I was excited (which can also cause shaking hands) I did fine. If I can work on making sure to build the excitement, I might be able to overcome the phone issues. It’s an idea I plan to try as I think of it. You see, you can’t memorize what you are going to say on the phone. I tried when I did phone sales. My stuff was memorized for the person if they followed their lines, they never did. But maybe when I plan to talk to someone I love, friends, and the family I can start applying this excitement over anxiety. Have you tried it? Did it work for you?

You may find a ton of things to help you in Ms. Petersen’s story. As a journalist she gets personal yet she hangs onto that ability to step back and remain ‘just the facts, M’am’ research writer. I loved reading this book! I hope others who have had to endure mental illness either personally or someone you love, will take the time to read it. Maybe you’ll find some answers.

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Rewards of two days of 2 mile walks three angles of the same sunset

And finishing this cute little guy:

Life is good.


 

 

What would be your ideal fantasy way to spend Monday?

With all that has been going on with moving in my son, today we took the dog for a walk. It was fun to chat and stroll. Perfect Monday.

What one person that you are out of contact with would you like to say thank you to?

My grandmothers and aunts. Every one of them gave me gifts to be grateful for. My maternal grandmother was a spitfire a tiny giant. My paternal grandmother (who I think I look like most) a warm hospitable woman with a sense of humor that lasted far past her Alzheimer’s. My maternal aunts who taught me to knit, crochet, sew, and to want and love children. I think of them every day! My paternal aunts, one inspired my desire to learn German and encouraged me in ways I didn’t even realize until I got older. Another of my paternal aunts feels near all the time. Her sense of humor, like her mother’s and love that just never ended. Her daughter shines the same love.

There are so many other aunts and ALL my wonderful cousins–What you wanted ONE person? Can’t narrow it down!

Oh, and we haven’t started on friends… If this wasn’t so public I would mention each and every one. I love you all!

List your favorite toys or games as a kid?

Swimming pool. Does that count? Okay, pogo-stick, jacks, twirling on the bars at school, swinging, oh how I miss swinging. Hula hoop, biking, wiggle-waggle board, BOOKS,oh, and swimming. Other things I loved are pictured above.

What did you appreciate or what made you smile this past week?  Feel free to use a quote, a photo, a story, or even a combination. 

Going through all the pictures of the games and toys made me smile. Thinking of my awesome life makes me smile.

Thank you Cee for this fun way to explore our worlds. Check out her site: Cee’s Photography.


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Stream of Consciousness Saturday is brought to us by Linda G Hill. The prompt today is march to be used in any way.

 

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Harness–check

Vest–check

Leash–check

Crocs–check

Sweatshirt–check

Windbreaker–check

Treats–check

Oops–Sunglasses–went back–check

Forgot GLASSES!

Forgot CELLPHONE!

Forgot Water!

I didn’t realize I forgot those last three until a mile in. We just marched on. Kali quite proud to get to lead the way. We both wimped a little at the corner house with the three barking dogs. Kept a short leash and only a few whines and “Sh’s” but once past I let her lead the way. She knew where she was going and remembered her favorite marked spots.

When we got to the next big street she decided to turn. We hadn’t gone down that dirt street before so it was an adventure for both of us.

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See that haybarn? That’s where we were at this point. WAY OVER THERE!

 

I was worried that we would meet up with loose dogs. In fact, I thought I saw one ahead. That’s when I realized I only had on sunglasses. Got closer and realized it was a Jack Rabbit. Duh! Now Kali was aware! We have great things to chase here! I told her we don’t chase them, they are bigger than she is!

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Seeing the rabbit seemed to give Kali a boost. She gave off a more confident air and marched with her head raised. Even though we were the next official street over we could see the back of our house. That’s when I noticed I didn’t have my cell with me. I kind of wanted to call and tell Hubby to look out the window to wave, but alas!

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We got to the next street sign. I couldn’t read it until on top of it. Then I saw that the sign had worn out so that only a bit of the word showed up. But in the faded background, I saw the whole name. I knew this street went straight through to my own. I also knew it connected close to a house with a loose dog. Gulp.

What I didn’t know was there are two homes between where we were and where we needed to go. Gulp number two. What if there were other loose dogs?

Safely by the two nice homes with nice little fences and no barking dogs, we got to the corner of our street. Now my biggest fear: DOG HOUSE! Luckily said dog didn’t come out to either greet me as has been in my experience in pre-Kali days, nor was that dog sitting outside. We got past that house with a bit of a ‘whew’ when from across the street we heard barking. I pulled the leash close and said, “Heel!” Kali stayed close. Dog didn’t come out. We were safe. I call that house (across from ‘dog house’) Statue House because there is a statue of a frontier guy in that yard. I don’t know the people of either house but I like their unique yards.

Now safe I told Kali to take us HOME. She smelled her marked spots and led us straight here. I pulled out a treat. She smelled it but didn’t take it. She just Marched to the back porch and into the house. As soon as I took off her walking garb I offered her the treat again and she took it to her bed and enjoyed the heck out of it.

Though a little tired, I marched into my room proudly to see if I couldn’t figure out how far we went. Are you ready for this? 2.3 miles! Yay! I know. It isn’t like those 6-8 mile trips we took last year but I am still alive after this walk. Those walks KILLED me. I think if I work up to it I will find those walks more fun. Especially with Kali!

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She’s pooped!

An hour later?

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Me:  Wanna go for a walk?

Her:  Again? Nah, that ‘s okay you go ahead. I’ll wait right here. Yawn!

 


Kali and I took a walk today.  Well, we actually took two walks.

We went west nearly a block, there is a house with a big dog that isn’t tied up or fenced in. I’ve made friends with that dog on previous walks without Kali. I just didn’t want Kali’s walk to be scary. Then came back home. I offered her treats as I got to our driveway telling her this is “home”.

Neither of us was ready to go inside. It was not windy. There was enough sun to be wonderful outside. So we walked to the end of our dirt road and turned south.

Right there on that corner, our neighbor has three big dogs. They are in his fenced yard. But they bark at everything that passes. I walk Kali on a tight leash on the other side of the street. I tell her I’m afraid of those dogs and to stay close to me. She is getting it. She whines a little. I remember Cesar’s training of dogs and “sssss” or “shshshshsh” her while keeping the leash tight. Once past the dogs, we relax. I give her the length of her leash.

We walked to the end of that block. I’ve never walked in that direction. With no car, our walks have always been toward our little town. But now that there is a car in our household, though it is gone with my brother to work every day, we have no great need. He picks up the mail or groceries. So Adventure! new route to explore!

Then we walked back home. Past the barking-dog-corner and driveway, “home” + treat. Then we went in to rest. I realized I didn’t have the map or mileage of the walk.

It wasn’t that far so when Kali wanted to do the “outside” thing again we donned harness, vest, leash, sunglasses, sweatshirt, hat–I think you know who wore what–we took the same walk. This time I made sure I had the app turned on, on my phone.

Well, the walking west part was the same. The walking east was the same. But when we went south we explored more. We got to see the back of our property. We got to see the haybarn I can see from my kitchen window. So cool!

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Easy to see in this old winter picture. Now no snow and it is green sagebrush everywhere. It looks like a quick walk–if there were no fences between here and hay barn. But going around the block was much longer.

So it was a fun day with two walks. Saw things up close I had not seen that way before. Maybe next time I will make sure to take pictures. After all–the satellite for the GPS couldn’t track me so all I had at the end was that each walk was about 40 minutes long. I estimated about 2 miles or 4. Don’t know. Whatever, it was was good for Kali and me. She’s knocked out beside me. And not nearly as shaky as she has been.

So how do you all handle the other dogs issues on your walks? I trust Kali, just not so much those big dogs.


Or could this be early Monday Madness? No. It still has to be Sunday as I am still awake. If I say it is Monday then I will have missed a day of blogging and my record is ruined! I can’t have that! I like that I do this every day. Even when it isn’t the greatest of blogs, it is the habit I want to keep.

Some things in our lives don’t take working at. Like breathing, swallowing, eating. But some days getting out of bed is a challenge. So I try to make sure I do it. I try not to take naps so that my nights are better, but since Hubby broke his shoulder our schedules have messed up with pain and naps have to happen. Brushing teeth. There is one that isn’t like breathing. I have to tell myself a couple times a day to do it or it flies away into the land of forgotten things. Brushing my hair. This one includes pain sometimes so I have to find a way to keep it corralled. A ponytail does that and keeps it out of my eyes and off my face. I’m seriously thinking of cutting it all off. The only thing that stops me is the in-between lengths when it can be so much more work than a ponytail.

Reading is like breathing. I never have to tell myself to read. It just happens. Writing reviews? Not as easy. In fact, I have three I need to do tomorrow!

Along with reading is loom knitting. My hands get anxious when I am not doing it.

Gosh, I think that is all of the easy habits. EVERYTHING ELSE TAKES –what? Will-power? Not so much. Will-power is energy I don’t have. And doing the blog and my languages and my piano and taking walks have to flow from something else. Passion? Not the flaming kind. But, yeah–that or a sense of pride?

Sorry that I am using you as a sounding board but jump right in and help me understand how to make better habits. I do feel a sense of pride for blogging every day since New Years and the same track record on the Duolingo languages.

All of this was somewhat easier when I was a full-time mom, working, pre-pain. Now I have to work at all of it. I’m truly sorry for the parents who have to deal with pain, for people who have to work while in pain. Yes, I did have that and managed. But I’m going to tell you, faking it, smiling and doing your job dressed in uncomfortable clothing, thinking when your brain refuses, all that catches up with you; can break you. Finding the balance back then was doing nothing after work. So many things I wanted to do but had no energy to try.

Now I have all the time but lack energy and funds. So I want to do it wisely. I have so many interests. I have always had a million interests. How to turn those into habits so as to squeeze the most out of the life I’m in.

How do you all handle your passions, interests, balance?

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